Joke Quotes

"A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths." "I poured spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone." "I bought some powdered water but I don't know what to add" "I went to a place to eat it said breakfast any time so I ordered French toast during the Renaissance" "If you were going to shoot a mime would you use a silencer" "I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time" "I'd give my right arm to be... ambidextrous" "You can't just take something, put it in a different context and expect it to be funny" "I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met"