Mark Twain Quotes

"If a woman tells you she's twenty and looks sixteen, she's twelve. If she tells you she's twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she's damn near forty" "America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between." "The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office." "The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why." "If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything." "Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please." "Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't." "To succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence." "Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well." "Classic: a book which people praise and don't read." "I think that God in creating Man somewhat overestimated his ability." "Against the assault of laughter, nothing can stand" "I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter" "I have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends will call it" "The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated" "Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society" "The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter" "Be careful about reading health books. You may die"